Okay, so I have been missing!
No this time around my intention was not
to go under the radar or into hiding etc… Oh I have had my fair share of “hide and
seek sessions’… Done that a couple of times in the past, only to realize now that how stupid it is to run away from things/people who should actually be
hiding from me. Alas if only they had the shame and the sense. I have nothing to run away from, so I am staying! Armed with
that self realization, I decided to stand, face and tackle people/issues
that come my way.
As for this time’s missing goes, I have been lazy when it comes to
actually sitting down and typing those thoughts out for everyone to see. I say
lazy because, usually no matter how busy I am I force myself to find time and
to jot down something to entertain my followers and myself (I presume there are
followers!) I did write, that I did, but I wrote for my eyes only, for even
I, no matter how OPEN and VOCAL I maybe about my feelings, there are still some
dark, hidden feelings and thoughts I would like to keep veiled from the
whole world. For I know these thought processes do no good and it would only
raise a few questions about the stability of my mind and shed light onto my
criminal instincts. Now I wouldn't want that would I? NOT AT ALL!
The thing is my company (not to mislead you, I am an EMPLOYEE, I do not
own the company, but I feel and am made to feel as though it is my own… after
all having spent 5.5 years with the same organization and having played a key
role in its growth, it’s fair to call it “MY” company!) has been growing
exponentially, and with exponential growth comes extreme work pressure, time
constraints and a mad number of arguments both internally and externally. All
in all with all this and my daily dose of body numbing activities, I agree
writing and other creative aspects of my life did take a back seat.
Writing holds a very strong place in my life, expressing my feelings and
my opinions of any and everything under the sun has always been one of my core
strengths. So since I wasn't into any of my usual creative outlets, neither
dancing, nor blogging or taking pictures, I had these conversations with MYSELF. On the way to work, on the way back, going to bed and waking up in the
morning. An internal dialogue discussing, debating, and coming to conclusions
on various different matters at hand. I believe it is truly beautiful to be
able to have a conversation with oneself and know yourself. It is in many ways
spiritual, it awakens your awareness, your mind, body and soul all twining,
unwinding and reaching out for some sort of release, for some sort of closure.
It is quite similar to meditating. Concentrating on one particular word for
definite period of time triggers a similar reaction. It is a fabulous way to mediate!
For example think of word, an interesting one at that, and keep repeating it umpteen number of times and soon you will be in a trance! The word need not be religious, it be something as interesting and beautiful as EUNOIA (yoo-NOH-ee-ah) — It comes from a Greek word meaning "well
mind" or "beautiful thinking." It is also rarely used medical
term referring to a state of normal mental health. PERFECT Right?
Adding a bit of trivia, (BTW did i mention learning new words is a hobby?) this word is the shortest word in the English language that contains
all 5 vowels! EUNOIA is also said to be one of the bases needed for a trusting friendship between husband and wife. A Beautiful mind.
There are always people around us, family, friends, colleagues, social
networks, media, and the rest to tell us what to do, what to think, how to
think, what to react and how to react. We must listen to each and every one of
them and then THINK for ourselves, yes? This exhilarating internal conversation
is exactly that for me. A combination of clearing my mind’s attic, meditating
and rejuvenating.
We often look for answers in others, in other things, in places. If only
we spend a fraction of this time to look inside us. Once we do, we will find
the exact answers, all of them, right inside us. Inside us we have a large,
unexplored sea, a sea to answer all the right questions, then why is it that we
are content getting bits and pieces of trivial tit- bits from outside? We need
to move the curtains clouding over our brains, our ideas and then we find all
the answers and we get what we seek.
What is it that I seek? I seek only ONE THING. But in line to achieving that ONE thing, I seek smaller things. I seek-ed a change of
AIR. A change of atmosphere, a cut off from the monotony and the mundane daily
affairs, and what have I got was a two week vacation off my beloved homeland by
default, by circumstances and by CHOICE to my Homeland by nature of ancestry!
But now I am back, revived, refreshed and re-energized to face the big
bad world of business. Back to my favorite place, DUBAI. Back to recounting my
experiences and back to my creative channels!
So, Let there be Clarity. Of Heart. Of Thought. Of Life.
